We’ve all heard it – “bipolar is a superpower”. “It makes you so creative and productive.” But honestly, few things piss me off as much as hearing this. I think it’s great that so many people can imagine the illness in a positive light, but isn’t it bypassing the real, heavy darkness that encompasses bipolar disorder? We wouldn’t say the same about other serious illnesses such as cancer or MS, then why is it done for bipolar? And if you’re someone who has bipolar disorder and you view it as a superpower, I can’t help but wonder – how? (Read – Early Signs of Hypomania)
See, I’m not trying to be rude or even a “negative Nancy”. I’m just a girl living with bipolar disorder wondering how anyone living with it could see it as a super power. Am I doing something wrong that I don’t see it the same way?
How is it that something that makes me want to throw myself in front of a moving vehicle just to make the feeling stop a superpower? How is something that leaves me paralyzed on the couch in a complete state of nothingness a superpower? Or writing suicide notes? (It’s important to plan for crisis situations when you live with bipolar disorder so get your Emergency Crisis Plan Template now.)
Calling it a superpower makes me think that you don’t realise the depths of the darkness. It’s an illness of extremes and while one extreme could look fun and exciting, there’s a whole other side to it that needs to be considered. The darkness. The depression. The nothingness. Such an empty throbbing feeling that you’d do nearly anything just to feel again.
It’s scarier than a black hole. It’s scarier than being alone in a state of nothingness. It’s an all-consuming everything that is suffocating. It’s impossible to carry and so hard to cope with.
The feeling sucks everything out of you. The body aches and screams for you to stop. Stop what you’re doing and just sleep. But, unfortunately, life doesn’t always fit bipolar depression episodes into it’s schedule. (Mood tracking can make a really big difference so snag yours before they sell out – Mood Tracker)
So you’re left with no choice other than to try to push through. Again, not a superpower. But rather a helpless feeling, grasping at straws, praying to whomever you pray to that you can survive the day. That somewhere the energy will flow through you and you’ll be able to appear somewhat “normal”.
This is the superpower that some might call bipolar disorder. It’s a feeling of desperation. As if you’re silently begging every person you come into contact with to end this numbness already. Please.
You wander through your day, completing some tasks, but not really ever there. Smiling and nodding at appropriate times though.
For me it’s all-consuming. I think for many of us, but I can only really share my personal feelings. It feels like I’m moving through molasses as I attempt to seem normal on the outside. My arms stiff, my back aches and I just want it to stop. But on the outside t looks more like “Here’s your lunch buddy! All ready for school?” I smile, hoping that my eyes and facial expression tells him that I’m totally fine and just excited for his day. Because I never want him to feel any of this. (I wrote more about this over here – My Unfiltered Life With Bipolar Disorder)
For me it’s in the routine. The things that I have to do daily because it’s what my kids depend on. But so often it’s done in numbness and emptiness. The reminders “don’t forget your ski-pants!” “Do you have your library books?” The responsibilities make it so much more. I try so hard to move through my days fairly similar so my kids never feel the extremes that I feel. (Read more about Parenting with Bipolar Disorder)
For me it’s that tiredness that never goes away. Like I could close my eyes and just sleep for forever because that’s how tired my soul is of fighting. Intrusive thoughts constantly waging war on me and honestly? I just feel done. But it’s only 7:30am. There’s still an entire day ahead.
I continue to move through the molasses to do all the tasks. I smile, though it’s forced. In fact, it probably even looks forced. I try to put a spark in my tone of voice. I try to be “that” mom. The happy, excited one. I try really hard actually and I never really feel like I nail it.
When people say bipolar disorder is a superpower, I can’t help but just shake my head. Such emptiness and darkness can’t possibly be a superpower. It robs me of so much and I will never live without it. It’s not like I’m going to get better or anything. This is it. This is as good as it’s getting for me. So when I hear “it’s a superpower” I feel like the world is just not understanding how terrible living with this illness really is. It’s not about a superpower. It’s about survival and a lifelong battle to obtain stability.
If you’re having suicidal thoughts or need someone to talk to please reach out.
🇨🇦 Canada — Crisis & Mental Health Support
National/General Crisis Lines
- Canada Suicide Prevention Service (CSPS)
📞 Phone: 1-833-456-4566
🧠 Text: 45645 (daily, 4pm–12am ET)
🌐 https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/
24/7 Crisis Support
- Crisis Services Canada Online Chat
🌐 https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/
Provincial Helplines
(Many provinces have 24/7 support — check local listings if needed)
- Manitoba
📞 Klinic Crisis Line: 1-888-322-3019 - Ontario
📞 ConnexOntario: 1-866-531-2600
📱 Text: 258258 (Crisis Text Line) - British Columbia
📞 BC Mental Health Support Line: 310-6789 (no area code) - Alberta
📞 Alberta Mental Health Help Line: 1-877-303-2642 - Quebec
📞 Suicide Action Montreal: 1-866-277-3553
(If your province isn’t listed above, local health authority websites maintain up-to-date crisis resources.)
Distress Centres (by province)
Your local distress centre can provide emotional support and referrals — find one at:
🌐 https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/find-support/
🇺🇸 United States — Crisis & Mental Health Support
National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
📞 988 (Call or Text — 24/7)
🌐 https://988lifeline.org/
Connects you to trained counselors for immediate support anywhere in the U.S.
Veterans Crisis Line
📞 988, then Press 1
📱 Text: 838255
🌐 https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/
SAMHSA National Helpline
📞 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
🌐 https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline
*Free, confidential, 24/7 support and treatment referral.
📌 Emergency Services
If someone is in immediate danger:
📞 Call 911 (U.S.)
📞 Call 911 (Canada)
If safe to do so, stay with the person until help arrives.
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